The Mental Battle

Am I being punished or is this a life lesson?

Only you can answer that—no, wait, only God can answer that. I asked God that. I prayed about all my sins wondering if I did something to bring this about. If so, I wanted to do what was necessary to get right with God. I concluded that God had a reason for this and that I better be looking for what he wanted to teach me. I don’t think that God tries to make my life bad, but I do believe that He uses things that happen in my life to teach me. I wanted to learn this lesson well, so I perhaps wouldn’t have to deal with this again.

Investigate my life, O God, find out everything about me; Cross-examine and test me, get a clear picture of what I’m about. See for yourself whether I’ve done anything wrong- then guide me on the road to eternal life. Ps 139: 23-24

When I began to go to God and to confess my sins, He forgave me! That is amazing! I don’t deserve a second chance. I’ve had so many already. But God, in his wonderful, loving way has continued to give me grace and mercy when I deserve none. (Nehemiah 9: 28b- And when they cried out to you again, you heard from heaven, and in your compassion you delivered them time and time again.) In Isaiah 43: 2, the Lord says, “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you. And, when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned. The flames will not set you ablaze.”

Your life is never out of control when God is by your side. A God who loves me that much must have my best interests at heart. I should trust Him, he loves me. I don’t understand why I have to deal with the cancer, but I plan to keep my eyes open to see what I should learn from all this.

I am trying to listen to you, Lord……Maybe, He has to really slow me down from my insanely busy life, to get in a word or two. I am looking for your word today.

Here are more verses on this topic.


Psalm 25:11 For the sake of your name, O Lord; forgive my iniquity, though it is great.

Psalm 103:1-3 Praise the Lord, O my soul, all my inmost being, praise his holy name.

Praise the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits

who redeems your life from the pit

and crowns you with love and compassion.

1John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.


Psalm 48:14 For this God is our God for ever and ever, he will be our guide even to the end.

Psalm 118:8 It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man.


“As you exercise your courage, exercise your faith as well.” (Taken from God is in the Small Stuff by Bruce Bickel and Stan Jantz)